Why your last Job is like your Ex

There is a period of time when you separate from your significant other that you feel remorse  for leaving them, you look at their pictures and feel the regret, you think you will never find that connection again with anyone else and  when you see them, they seem to be having more fun without you. You think of calling them and begging them to take you back. You know it’s bad for you, the relationship never worked out and yet we look back at the good old days, always thinking that maybe we would be better off with them. Maybe just maybe they would take you back.

But in reality, you know deep down it was wrong and there was a reason that you are no longer with them.

Leaving your job or changing jobs is very similar, when you leave your job you feel a weight lifted off your shoulders or when you first change jobs, there is always a period of learning and exploration, you are excited with all the new opportunities this job presents and applying your knowledge and experience in that new job. Everyone is super nice to you in the beginning.

But after the honeymoon period, whether the expectations increase, or you either have more responsibility or a bigger workload or maybe even a harder job than usual, or even not finding a job right away, you start feeling the pressure.

This is when you start thinking fondly of your previous job, looking back at all the good times, whether it was a simpler job, less stress, less work or more secure. You start regretting leaving that cushy job, even start discussing it with family and friends, telling them you were better off before and how could you have left, thinking it was the worst decision of your life.

This puts an even bigger pressure on you at your current job and makes you angrier and demotivated. Why oh why?

Lets think about this for a moment. Was it really better?  Were you were happier before? Was there less work? Maybe it was and maybe you were happier, but why do you think you left? There was a reason and it was this reason that made you take the decision to move on and change jobs. If you keep on thinking about it for too long, it will start affecting the quality of work and you will be miserable. Make the most of what you have at the moment and do your best, you will find that after all, it’s not so bad.

As the saying goes, the grass is always greener on the other side. Don’t be fooled and remember the good with the bad, it will make your life much easier and you will finally fit comfortably in your current job until its time to move on again and repeat the cycle.

Never beg for your job back, it puts you in a weaker position and if you do go back after that you will very quickly fall back into the same issues 10 fold.